Back to Center

This summer I have been thinking a lot about what sustains me and keeps me balanced, particularly during times of stress. While I am always excited to get back into fall routines and meet a new batch of college students, the transition from summer to fall always seems to get me a bit anxious as well.

For me, and I am sure for others, the foundational trio of good sleep, nutrition, and exercise is key. But I also find that even with this foundation, my ability to stay calm in the moment is sometimes is harder than it used to be. I sometimes experience that disorienting "fight or flight" feeling when something difficult happens.

I've realized that having something to say to myself, a mantra of sorts, can help keep me from feeling further stressed in the moment. Playing tennis with my son the other day, I hit upon one that I realized I was saying to myself: "Back to center."

The inspiration for this phrase comes from my 81-year old father, a man of many talents including excellent tennis skills . Each time I play tennis with my dad he does two admirable things: 1) praises any good moves and 2) offers ideas for "upping" my game. As a teacher, and coach, for many years, he has a skillful way of offering suggestions that feel like support and encouragement rather than a critique.

Last year when we played together, my dad noticed that after I hit the ball, whether a forehand or backhand, I tended to hang around in the same spot on the court. This habit meant that I was often not prepared for the next shot if it came in another part of the court, and was scrambling to reach it, or in many cases, not getting to it at all.

"After you hit, get back to center to prepare for the next shot," my dad advised. "That way, wherever the ball comes, you'll be in a better spot to get it." It was such a good observation. Since then, every time I play and find myself lingering too far on one side or the other, I murmur to myself, "Back to center. Back to center."

This idea of experiencing something--a missed shot, an unexpected loss, a mistake, a conflict--and then working to return back to "center" really resonates with me. It's become my new favorite mantra. It reminds me that I cannot control many things that happen, but I can work to gently guide my feet (and mind) back to that center line--ready for the next shot.